I don’t have more free time.
I have felt burnt out,
compelled to refrain
from complaining
about doing schoolwork,
about loss of income,
about living alone,
about how to process change.
My losses could be worse,
I sometimes feel guilty
for even comparing
to those who have experienced
the death
of loved ones.
I have to remind myself that
my problems are real,
my feelings are valid,
my pain does matter.
I’m still trying
to give myself
the permission
and room
to grieve
those losses.
Sam Illingworth is an Associate Professor at Edinbugh Napier University, whose work and research involve using poetry to help develop dialogues between different audiences, and to give voice to the underheard and underserved. He is also the founder or Consilience, the world's first science & poetry peer-reviewed journal, which aims to give a platform to new voices in order to help diversify science.